Super-shiny Harvard hair

Resting Barbie Face
***


Hello sweet friend,
What did you do this week?

I went to a party! I wore a decades- old DVF dress, had a cosmo, and flirted with my husband's colleagues. It was like the old days! 


I also received my very first reader-request. My girlfriend Erin (mentioned here) has the most perfect doll-human of a sister, named T-- (yes, I'm using the same notation as 18th century telegraphs). At T's wedding, she put that arriviste Kate to absolute shame: all white lace and wasp waist. 

You can imagine my surprise when T asked me to dish on hair-care secrets. Flattery, combined with an unquenchable need to re-shop Sephora.

In the end, I am an absolute miser, and moreover she wanted Real Me, not New&Improved Me-- so, no Sephora.

Hair background: as a child, I had curly auburn hair with blondish streaks; now, I only get reddish streaks in my dark brown hair during the summer. Now, I have extraordinarily coarse, thick, wavy/frizzy hair. 

Because intern year sufficiently absented me from a hairdresser, I grew out my hair to scapula-length. On the last day of that year, I wore my hair down. For the first time, the nurses cooed and petted me, saying how pretty I looked. Either because it was the last day and they wanted to make amends for a year of torture, or because I actually looked pretty, I'll never know, but since then I've kept it quite long (as seen in the above picture).

I wash my hair fortnightly. Joking. Sort of. Maybe 4 times a week (and yes, at night). I just don't have/make time, instead preferring to read and watch amazing youtubes



I do try to minimize the scents and artificial ingredients, since my son touches my hair constantly. I wash my hair with Jason's scalp treatment combo shampoo-conditioner, use Briogeo's leave-in conditioner as a regular conditioner (leaving it in for the entire duration of my 20min shower), then put it up in a quick-dry towel until I'm ready for bed. Next, I run through Briogeo's curl creme, and make a bun (with a no crease hair tie). Finally, I sleep. The sleep part is where the air-drying action all happens. 

Monogrammed MP hairbrush


In the morning, I brush with a Mason Pearson combo hairbrush and put Orofluido hair oil on the ends (the length below my shoulder, and ONLY A DROP). 

If my son has discovered something new to destroy in the master bath, giving me an unexpected 3 minutes of freedom, I do not sit and enjoy my Tazo Awake Tea. No, I T3 flat iron the curly roots of my wavy hair from temple to temple (that is, only the front 0.5" depth "strip" of hair along width the crown of my head). This makes my hair look bigger, and makes me seem like I am a Completely In Control Mommy. 


Either way, I get my hair off my face with an indestructible J. Crew hair claw.

On in-between days, I change the routine slightly. At night (post-hair-wash-day 1), I use the Klorane dry shampoo with nettle (DO NOT USE THE BRIOGEO ONE IT IS MY ENEMY). This is unscented, and it is the only thing that: puts volume back in my hair, doesn't feel crunchy, doesn't make my roots gray, doesn't spray in a giant mess, doesn't breakout my forehead, and only requires 1 application to last a few days (the Klorane tinted oat milk version is also good, but not as long-lasting). I put it in, let it sit for a minute while I brush my teeth, then brush my hair through and sleep in it. This sequence ensures that it "settles" into my hair, it is evenly distributed, and that it works preventatively to avoid oil buildup. Prior to brushing it out, I again apply the hair oil sparingly. Then I put it up in a bun to sleep. 

The next morning (i.e. post-hair-wash-day 2), I only brush it out (but I brush out my hair upside down to stimulate the scalp, and get a good laugh out of my baby audience-of-1). 

On day 3, I make a very high ponytail, and tie the base with a narrow scarf. That night, I will wash my hair again. 



As alluded to in the opener, I occasionally correct my slovenly ways, and do a proper hair-do. In that case, I have to prepare the day before, because again: I only ever air-dry my hair. The next day (that is, the day of the event), I will flat-iron my hair a bit more thoroughly (from ear -to-ear, instead of just the top), and put it up in Conair 2" hot rollers for ~20 min. In the last few minutes, I Bumble&Bumble hair spray the entire head (do not try to substitute Elnet- you'll smell like diesel combustion). I re-spray after the rollers are out and then run my hands through my hair, especially tousling the roots. To the ends, I apply Oribe moisturizing cream (the "everyday oil" I mentioned above makes the curls fall flat). At no point do I brush my hair- it will only leave behind Dirty-Dancing-era Jennifer Grey hair.  

As for the other part of having long hair: I take two supplements for general health, and these seem to have improved my hair's overall condition. Both are from Costco: omega-3 capsules, and biotin gummies (in addition to CVS prenatal gummy vitamins). 



Writing all this out makes me realize that I've recently came up with a "complete" 3 minute shower routine-- i.e.: including shaving and hair washing. I'll go into depth on that one another day, for the new mothers, young professionals, and oversleepers alike. 

I want to get the Amika hair straightening brush, but it's so expensive-- have you tried it? Any opinion?

Have a wonderful week! See you next Sunday!

Wishing you the health of happiness,
Mama, M.D.

P.S. The title of the post is actually a mis-quote of my all-time favorite show: "Oh trust me, you are [one of the Harvard-bound]. You've got that really good, straight, shiny Harvard hair."     

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